By Liz Freedman 10. Pre-COVID I was not the thorough handwasher that I thought I was. It turns out that 20 seconds is MUCH longer than I realized. 9. I can cut my husband's hair with clippers and wash & style my 90 yr old mother’s “hairdo” (neither perfectly, but good enough to be seen on Zoom). 8. I can hold a full Torah service in my living room for my son to become a Bar Mitzvah. 7. I can be creative and adaptable (who knew!) in finding ways to mark milestones and celebrate birthdays and holidays while still holding on to rituals and family traditions. 6. I enjoy entertaining much more outdoors when I know there is little chance of anyone seeing the inside of my house - I’d rather prepare duplicates of each dish than tidy-up my house! 5. I can work effectively from home but also discovered that it quickly grew old for me and that I was ready to be back in the office. 4. I dread having to plan for 3 at-home meals a day, every single day, for 4 people (ok, maybe I highly suspected that one beforehand…). 3. I really do enjoy the company of my 3 family members “living under one roof” - we could still make each other laugh after months of being cooped up together. 2. While I deeply and achingly miss weekly Shabbat dinner at my parents with 3 generations of in-town family squished around the table, I cherish lighting candles and making kiddush in my own home, with those generations in front of me on the screen. And the #1 thing that I learned about myself during the pandemic: 1. In order to accomplish most of the above, I need to rely on other people. There is an irony in realizing that confinement is not about turning inward and being self-sufficient but rather it is about looking outwards and being open to asking for help. It can actually be the opposite of isolation. I needed someone to coach me on how to style hair and I borrowed the clippers from an old friend that I hadn’t seen in ages; I needed my extended family to make Passover and Rosh Hashanah truly feel like the Holidays; I needed my Dorshei Emet community to create a virtual congregation before whom my son could stand. It is true that no (wo)man is an island - we need community to not only endure but to thrive.
2 Comments
Natalie Amar
9/23/2020 05:20:15 am
#6: I've become a pro at tidying just the space within eyesight of the back door to the bathroom! Two completely different zones of the house!
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Deborah Kraus
9/24/2020 08:48:10 am
Thanks for this , Liz. I enjoyed your observations very much.
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